The S.S. Relation”ship”

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What’s the most important thing in a relationship? Communication! Relationships tend to go nowhere without it. I once heard that “a relationship without communication is like a car with no gas in it — you can stay in it, but you won’t go anywhere.” *drops jaw in amazement of how accurate this quote really is*

Now personally, communication is a bit of a hard task for me. Not saying I can’t communicate in general, because my attitude will let you know that REAL quick, but my problem lies in verbalizing my emotions. I’ve always been more of the quiet type. Always trying to stay behind the scenes. I hate talking, and I believe my love of writing  (hence the blog) stems from my hatred of communicating verbally.

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With relationships, communication is key because you can’t and won’t know what your significant other is thinking, what they like or don’t like or even how they feel. With that being said, I have come to the realization that I myself of guilty of not communicating as effectively as I probably should. This effort, or lack thereof, was not intentional, but as stated earlier, me being the quiet type, it just never really dawned on me. I guess I’m guilty of thinking that people will just automatically know what I mean without having to elaborate; as if they live in my head or something.

Now communication had never been that big of an issue for me until I met my current boyfriend. Before we met, I thought things were okay. Never thought twice about having an issue with communication. Even when we first started getting to know each other things seemed fine. But once we got serious, all that changed. We could not have been more different people. He talked a lot. Always had a thought or a viewpoint on everything. I just had the bare minimum to say. Not because I didn’t care, just because I’m a quiet girl. He is the extrovert. I’m the introvert. And at first, when I noticed him trying to bring me out of “my shell” I found it very annoying. I felt like he was trying to fix something that wasn’t broken. And I had a problem with that.

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Long story short, here we are a little over a year later and my communication has gotten better. I’ve learned that not only do you have to communicate for a relationship to function properly, but you also have to communicate effectively for your point to actually be heard. So for me that meant dropping the attitude, losing the quick temper and actually talking like I had some sense. And that doesn’t mean that I still don’t get a little short-tempered every now and again, but I am headed in the right direction.

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4 Replies to “The S.S. Relation”ship””

  1. Being in a relationship for a year and some months, I’ve discovered that I was so quick to get angry at What my boyfriend said or did. I feel as if I have put up a wall for protection because I don’t want to be hurt. I have commuciated with him time after time but it seems like it doesn’t get anywhere so for my sake i just sit quiet and hold everything in the inside hoping things will get better.. And by me holding my feelings in it seemed like things were okay. All the emotions,all headache I’ve given it all to God so He can turn it around

    1. That’s the smartest thing to do. After a while, you can only take so much. But when you give it to God, just make sure you give it all to him and don’t leave any room for worry within yourself. Faith without works is dead.

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